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– by Kyle Malone

Welcome back to The Cantina where we definitely serve your kind. I’m your bartender Kyle Malone and I’m serving up tall glasses of nothing but Star Wars.  By now you know I am the dedicated, well versed in the EU, experienced gamer, and open-minded fan this world needs. I see the flaws in The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi, but also the great moments too. I know the importance of The Empire Strikes Back but see how strong Return of the Jedi is. I see that the prequels… well… we’ll get there… maybe. There’s nothing more satisfying than a great Star Wars story, and I want more! 

It’s all about the leak-amins baby! Just like a real Cantina this place deals in rumors and information that could spoil major plot points for upcoming Star Wars projects. This stands as your warning, and I will not be held responsible for your broken heart, insane rage, or even pure delight caused by the information to follow. So, if you want to continue on, leave your blasters, vibroblades, and lightsabers at the door and scroll down…

SPOLIERS AHEAD

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Recent News And Rumors:

There has been a lot of buzz on title reveals and trailer releases recently, well ever since the 2018 holidays actually. I had thought we may have to wait until April, and Star Wars Celebration or Avengers: Endgame, to get our title reveal. Despite the feeling that we knew the titles for The Last Jedi and The Force Awakens well ahead of their releases,  both came almost a year prior to release dates. We got the title for TLJ in January and the trailer in April of 2017 too, so it wouldn’t be too surprising for Disney and LucasFilm to wait for the Episode IX reveals. That doesn’t keep people from their need — no, their desire — to get this information.

I had not intended to comment on supposed dates anymore, but one Anthony Daniels (C-3PO) has been generating anticipation over the last 24 hours with a couple of tweets:

It would be cruel to start teasing the title in such a way if it were hitting in April and not sooner. Daniels uses some 3PO lines from the past in these tweets, mentions “the one”, and starts spelling something. All very strange when adding that what he “sees” isn’t the right size or shape for a title or trailer. Of all the people to allow to tease the title though, Daniels is not one I would have thought of. Then again, poor 3PO has been underutilized in the Sequels. So how soon is this thing coming? Is it actually the title and/or trailer? What if we get a trailer with no title? They couldn’t possibly do that, could they?

On the other hand, do we already know the title? A leak from Reddit was covered by our very own Cam Clark here yesterday. The title is supposedly The Balance of the Force and like Cam, I don’t buy that. I buy into Son of Darkness more than that… but hate both. The title has no flow, but it does contain “of the” just like the third films of the OT and PT and this leak comes from a supposed screenshot which can be found here. That does help the rumor seem more possible, but we’ve already had a title with the word “Force” in it and there’s never been repeating words in the movie titles before. I don’t have a great idea for the final films title, but I do know that this isn’t a great idea either.

That covers the title, but why not delve into a supposed description of the equally anticipated trailer… or teaser… or teaser trailer, whatever they want to call it these days. This leak does come from Mike Zeroh via The Express. I do not think I have ever covered leaks from Zeroh, but I found a few things here interesting, and I have heard descriptions of similar scenes from other leaks of concept art and filming. Take this with more than a grain of salt, maybe like a tablespoon of salt.

Zeroh describes the following scenes:

“Rey sprinting across a battlefield with an ignited blue lightsaber, with dozens of resistance fighters running behind her towards a tall structure with a First Order flag. The next (scene) goes over (a) close-up of Kylo Ren’s face putting on his reforged helmet. There is a brief pause that leads to Kylo igniting the saber, which causes a red glow on the reforged helmet that has red lines running down it. Another goes over a glimpse of the major space battle with dozens of A-Wings, X-Wings, and Y-Wings fighting storms of TIE fighters and new forms of TIE Interceptors. The next goes over sequences of The Knights of Ren marching with Kylo Ren in front with his lightsaber ignited and pointing towards something or somebody.”

This type of action sounds exciting. Especially since we have yet to have a major space engagement in this Sequel Trilogy, and no, the long boring space chase that makes NO sense does not count. I would love for this one to be more action-oriented considering the long dry moments of story in The Last Jedi, but I still have that sneaking suspicion that we’re going to spend nearly two hours undoing and explaining things from the last film. Episode VIII was the place to get into the Knights of Ren, not the final movie as there’s not enough time to give them eight. I like the idea of Kylo getting back into the mask as this show’s his decent, or ascent, as the new Dark Lord of… whatever name he chooses. Remember they never called Snoke or Ren “Sith” and J.J. Abrams once said on record they weren’t. I want Kylo to remain a bad guy and not be “redeemed”, this will be more interesting and separate this Trilogy from the OT in a major way. I want the conclusion to this story, not another rehash of the OT.

There’s one more scene that is described:

“Lastly a shot of Rey entering a cave full of glowing blue crystals and white orbs flying around. It’s like something out of Avatar.”

The Express connects this scene to Force ghosts, and we all know about the rumors of Luke’s Force ghost being prominent in the upcoming film. Given fan’s dismay at the use of Luke in The Last Jedi it’s clear to see them using this movie to give us more Luke in an attempt to, once again, fix the previous film.

As for how “cool” this trailer sounds… I’d dig it. It sounds as if it gives us an idea of the tone of the film, without telling us too much story. however, that brings up the problem of the divided fan base. Do we need more story elements to reassure fans and get them into the theater opening weekend? I think some people will. You all know my feelings on The Last Jedi and despite the issues I have with it, I will be there, Thursday night, ready to see it all end.

Last Call: Scene Analysis

Revenge of the Sith is a… movie. I can’t bring myself to say good movie, but compared to the other Prequels it’s not bad either. It has one of the coolest space battles in all of the movies, even though it looks like a computer game, and it has what some consider to be the best lightsaber duel of all time. It’s the latter sentiment that I disagree with, severely. I know there’s some of you that are ready to kill me, but hear me out.

This was THE fight we had all been waiting for since the Prequel Trilogy started. The build-up to it, including the original Clone Wars cartoons, was some of the only good stuff to come from this era in Star Wars history. The brotherhood between Obi-Wan and Anakin was strong, but mostly carried on the acting chops of Ewan Mcgregor’s Kenobi. We had seen an amazing duel between Obi-Wan and Darth Maul in The Phantom Menace but had also seen the overly flashy duels with Dooku in Attack of the Clones so it was hard to tell where this fight would fall. In my mind, it fell into the “too flashy” realm.

The fight starts off with a fancy flip from Anakin after an overly exaggerated gesture from Kenobi and we immediately get into Anakin driving his master back. We get these two Jedi spinning their backs on each other six times in the first 15 seconds. The spins don’t make sense, they’re not to increase leverage or evade attacks, they simply “look cool.” The senseless, and realistically dangerous, spinning continues as the two head down a hallway and we eventually get to some, actually cool, brawling type moves. Anakin even chokes Kenobi while showing the best facial expressions he’s had throughout the whole saga.

We do get some cooler moments where they’re climbing around on towers and equipment, but even that becomes too much on the floating platforms where we get actual shots of their faces with nothing but blue flashes on screen. I believe they were trying to show the determination on their faces, but I think Hayden Christensen was wondering if he had left the curling iron on in his trailer. To put it simply, they went over the top with stunts and locations to make this epic, while completely forgetting that the epic-ness came from WHO was fighting, not how or where.

As for the cinematography and special effects, they suffer here just like they do in all of the PT. Just like the opening space battle, the CGI here has not aged well and we can often tell how fake everything is. Almost every flip and jump is assisted with CGI instead of done practically with a stuntman and wires, and it all takes its toll on the audience. The camera work itself is mostly okay. I do hate the moments where we only get their faces and the rapid blue flashing though.

When it’s all said and done, as a whole, this fight is disappointing. It tries too hard and basically becomes two dudes dancing with glow sticks. It’s hard to see this as anything else with all of the twirling… especially when compared to The Phantom Menace.

Well, that’s it for this week. Next week we are doing Star Wars Moments for Last Call. Please send me (kylem@lrmonline.com) your worst Star Wars memory for a chance to see it here! It could be the moment you realized how bad The Phantom Menace was, having your younger sibling open your mint condition Boba Fett figure, or scratching your only copy of the theatrical version DVDs ever released.

What do you think about the leaks this week? What do you think the title will be? Let us know in the comments below, and as always, may the Force be with you!

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SOURCES: Mike Zeroh (Via Express), Anthony Daniels 1 and 2, Reddit

Kyle is a business school graduate who loves movies, comics, and video games. He shares his passions with his wife and is raising a next generation geek.